UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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