have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
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