absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Me too!
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
