Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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