No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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