I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
