Well douche your snatch and let's go!
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize