Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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