remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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