dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
