also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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