i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
