I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
