If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
