My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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