I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Boobs speak an international language.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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