Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize