The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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