idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
