TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Randomize
