oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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