1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
