we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
