Princesses don't give blow jobs
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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