im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
