That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
