Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
