I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
