im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
