Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
