How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
