physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
