I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I just blew my weed a kiss
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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