Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
