I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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