So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
