i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm like, not good at living.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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