When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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