Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
It's Friday. Sex?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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