Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
