your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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