he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
