well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize