he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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