Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
