I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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