I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
