when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
