"it" just moved
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
