Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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