I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
