rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
